I truly believe our words can change the world. Whether spoken or written, language can either connect us or cause conflict. Choose wisely.
I shared in my book Faith Beats Fear the importance of not only God’s Word but ours as well. We so easily fall into complaint mode without realizing we’re jeopardizing our own faith. With each negative, cruel, despondent response we invite fear in to wreak havoc.
For example, I participated in what I thought at the time was a pretty innocuous pattern during the workweek. I used to fall right in line with my coworkers in speaking ill of Mondays and wishing for the fast arrival of Friday. I couldn’t wait until the weekend or time off. Every week, I said the same thing even if it wasn’t really true. I assumed Monday would be tough before the day even arrived and that colored my approach. Most Mondays I was grouchy or acted like I didn’t want to be at work. I didn’t even attempt to enjoy my week or remain open to divine assignments — I bided my time, waiting and wishing for Friday. Monday through Thursday was a blur. In essence, I was wishing my life away with silly words.
The reality was I needed all the time I could get to accomplish all I wanted to do. I needed to be thankful for every moment God granted me to live and thrive. So I stopped saying stuff that was contrary to that! I started speaking differently: I want to make the best out of this day. And I did. I invited God to bless, guide, and intervene throughout my day. And He did. Instead of bemoaning, “Oh, God, I have to…” I proclaimed, “Oh, God, thank You, I get to…”
I stopped speaking of my blessings (i.e. having a job even if it was stressful; having a car even if I was in traffic; having life even if it was challenging) as burdens. And I was more blessed. I asked God to show me the opportunity in my obligations. I discovered new ideas that improved my performance, professionally and personally. Adjusting my verbal expressions affected my actions, my relationship with God, and the people around me. It made me more intentional in everything. I wasn’t as overwhelmed by life, and I worked more efficiently and effectively toward my goals.
When I encountered a problem, I had a better way to handle it. Instead of feeling the heavy dread — a side effect that comes with complaining — I felt empowered to make choices and communicate my thoughts. This minor change reaped great results.
Those complaints seemed so innocent, and it felt okay because everyone else did it too. Complaining is so commonplace that you don’t realize when you fall into the pattern of speaking against yourself. It’s critical that you guard your mouth and keep from gossiping.
While it may feel satisfying and like you’re doing something at the outset, you’re really carrying around a lot of negative emotions. You’re not helping a situation or contributing anything worthwhile to solve whatever issue you’re experiencing. Before participating in a conversation, ask yourself: Is it right? Is it kind? Does it edify? What does it solve?
You have to choose your words more carefully. I’m not telling you to lie or pretend, but I’m imploring you to be thoughtful in what you say. Even the ‘little’ stuff makes a big difference.
It takes discipline, but changing your language will change your life..